The "experts", who ever the experts are, recommend that when making New Years Resolutions one should make resolutions they can keep. You know like Watch Less TV. I have never really taken the experts advice in the past but this year I thought I might start a list of resolutions that one could keep, pretty easily, thus improving their self esteem. This is just a starter list, add your own, I need some ideas.
1. | Gain 30 pounds.. This would be much easier and more fun than losing 10. |
2. | Insist on taking everything personally. The world revolves around me doesn't it? |
3. | Lust in your mind, daily |
4. | Always, No not always, Never, yeah never, no not never.. Sometimes okay Occassionally be courteous |
5. | Avoid shooting a nail gun up your nose |
6. | Put things off, in other words procrastinate more.. Begin sometime next year if possible |
7. | Eat,sleep,breath, and void yourself of waste and gases when necessary or fun |
8. | Listen to your friends, then ignore their advice |
9. | Create more than your fair share of carbon monoxide |
10. | Laugh at innapropriate times |